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Hi Sanjay,

I wanted to write you a note after reading your book; 'Reading People'.

I have to say, I am all for optimism and determination however, when I read some of the examples from your book, simply showing the way you got what you wanted; like the way you faked having a business proposal so that a company would send you to New York (just so that you could go on a date with a poor, unsuspecting woman, who didn't even know that you existed)

You wasted the time and good faith of anyone who showed the slightest bit of confidence in you - wise move(!)

And the example you gave when you were in high school and you tried to make a deal with Pepsi - you again, dishonestly took what wasn't yours and tried to make a deal that was never yours to make! How is this a good example for the people who try use YOUR book, in a bid to gain some help and guidance?!

Your actions more often than not seem to involve some kind of underhanded method, maybe even verging on being illegal at times - whether or not you 'get your way' in the end.

These are some of the most unprofessional and unethical actions that I have ever heard of.

It's dangerous when 'self help' comes from such a source, as it is like the blind leading the blind.

I write this with a truly genuine spirit- I hope that by helping you to see the error of your ways (possibly) it'll help you to help the people who read you and the few who take your advice on board.

Best,

Tom

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Tom, thank you for your email.

I will start off by saying that in the front of the book I have given you a warning not to try what I have done. It is my style, you will create your own.

I guess we can look at your comments from different perspectives. You might think what I did was underhanded or illegal, however I look at it as a boy learning his boundaries and abilities. Did you smoke or drink before 19? Did you get to drive the car in an empty parking lot before 16? I'm sure if we look at your life, we can say the same thing. The only difference is that I have been very open and all that I have done, was to create a future for myself and provide opportunities for others.

If you look at the two examples you gave, the high school and my New York meeting, a lot of money could have been raised for my school which today is on the verge of closing due to lack of funding. The New York deal provided a small clothing manufacturer the ability to partner up with a woman who had influence and money behind her when no one knew their name.

My examples were not to teach you to be underhanded, but to show you that taking risks is necessary for greatness. None of these acts hurt, embarrassed or stole from anyone. In fact these stories allowed for many people to confess to me their fears and insecurities because I was so open about mine.

I'm sorry you are seeing the negative. Maybe if you open your mind to the bigger picture presented, the book can be an asset to you.

However, I did enjoy reading your note and thank you for sharing.